The Absence Of Harshness

In part of her essay, “Eye To Eye”, Audrey Lorde writes about her experiences as a young Black child. In one example, she has undergone a fairly invasive eye examination for a three-year-old. She is hurting, tired, scared, and she wants her mother.

Lorde recalls a voice that she heard as a result of her “peculiar” eyes being examined. “From the looks of her, she is probably simple too.” The doctors all laugh. One pats her on the cheek and sends her out.

Lorde states in her essay, “I am grateful for the absence of harshness.”

I imagine that just about anyone who has a feature about them that can be perceived by others as a problem can relate to this. The feelings of not being accepted, not being loved, condescended upon, and merely tolerated is a powerful oppression that occurs. I think this oppression is sometimes intentional but sometimes it is not.

I think that unintentional oppression comes from a place of miseducation and ignorance. It’s easy to look at the person walking across the bridge at 11:30 in the morning and say “That person ought to go get a job.” It’s easy to give them $5 and send them on their way. But what if we began to understand them? What if we learned they have a disability. Perhaps that disability comes from a traumatic life that others can’t imagine in their own worst nightmares? We tolerate people getting off the bus who are talking to themselves wearing headphones but we certainly don’t go out of our way to engage them.

We do not help them, we simply spare them the harshness.

Transformation of Silence Into Language and Action – Audrey Lorde

Silence causes regret. One of the most profound things in this essay is Lorde’s statement that transforming silence into language and action is an act of self-revelation. Revelation that we will die. We will experience pain. We must not allow ourselves to remain silent because to do so is to is to cause our own anguish and suffering. We cannot avoid pain always but we can avoid suffering.

My silences had not protected me. Yours will not protect you.

The revelation that the important things that you have to say and the important actions that you need to do will be lost forever and will make you sick if you do not let them out will leave you suffering by your own doing. Letting your voice be heard can help you deal with the tyranny we encounter.

It is also our responsibility to seek the words of those who have been silenced. We must read what they write, listen to what they say and examine how their lives are different from those who are not oppressed.